Learning Guitar Part 1
Wednesday, February 15th, 2006This is part 1 is a 5 (or 6) part series that chronicles my $48 worth of hard earned guitar lessons at the local Community Recreation Centre.
I’ve always thought about learning guitar. I used to play the trumpet for about 8 years and started having keyboard lessons for a while too. Since stopping that when i hit college i’ve been short of an instrument to play and the guitar has always been something that i figured other people learned. I didn’t really need to, even though i knew i’d like to. I’ve really been getting into the new Johnny Cash “American” series albums, where he plays other people’s songs, like U2 and Nine Inch Nails. They’re great albums and the guitar lines are simple, yet really interesting to listen to. A couple of months ago when i was at a mate’s place i noticed he had a guitar lying around and i though, hey i reckon i could do some silly shit with this, so i asked to borrow it and he was more than happy to give me a loan as he’s not playing anymore.
So i’m standing at the counter, ready to pay my $48 for one terms worth of Adult Education Guitar lessons and there is an old guy standing in front of me in the line, i notice that he is there with his son and he enquires as to where the guitar lessons are being held, as the staff ask around to see which room is designated for this activity, i also throw in that i am waiting for guitar lessons too. The old fella looks up at me and smiles, nervously. I am directed to the designated room and while i am paying up-front for my lessons a young boy walks through the doors to the recreation centre holding a guitar case. He continues through a door towards the “music room”. I finish paying and while i am walking towards the same room another little boy rocks up with a guitar in arm. We pass a yoga class on our right and a very loud spin class on our left, the spin class are pumping some early 90′s techno and yelling at each other about how much faster and harder they should be going.
We enter the room together and to my surprise, it’s just the 4 of us. One of the young boys introduces himself to me as Lloyd and asks to see my guitar. He proceeds to explain to me that a bluebird is a great guitar as they have such great amplification. Then he changes his mind and retracts the statement about it being a ‘Bluebird’, he still thinks it has great amplification though. He asks me if i know how to play an E on the piano in the room, i do, so i play it, and Lloyd then tunes both my guitar and his. He tells me how he can play piano too, and that was they key that he though it was, he just needed to check. He has been studying guitar here for 6 months… He is 11 years old… He likes Wolfmother…. No, he like 70′s rock bands… etc, etc, etc…. The other 2 boys in the room are very quiet, or perhaps they are just normal but seem quiet because no-one can get a word in around Lloyds constant rambling or compete with the volume of the spin class next door.
Our teach finally arrives (late), his name is Alex and is a tall, thin man, who flops around as we walks, he looks weak. I don’t know what i expected from an Adult Ed. Guitar Teacher, but then the 3 children in the room weren’t really what i expected from Adult Ed. classmates either. Alex tells us to come and help him as the chairs in the room are no good at all. We follow Alex into the Yoga room down the hall to get “better” chairs. Needless to say these chairs are kids chairs, but at least we get to walk past the yoga girls. Alex stands in the yoga and ‘supervises’ as we get some chairs.
The lesson finally begins with Alex sitting us down and proclaiming how much he hates teaching “i just do it for the money, if i do it too much, i end up hating music”. Now there’s a lesson for you kids. We go around the room and talk about why we are here, why we want to play the guitar and what sort of music we like. The kids are a bit bashful (except for Lloyd), in fact Lloyd’s talking gets so constant at one point that Alex asks him if he has always been this hyper-active. He explains that his parents got some tests done on him once and found that he was in fact ‘testachloctin”, “what the hell does that mean?” asks Alex. “It means that i learn things by doing them” replied Lloyd. Alex thinks for a second and then in wonderment proclaims, “well hell, doesn’t everyone? I could have told you that!”. We were also told to close our eyes and imagine where we want to be in 5 years with our guitar playing. Again, the kids seemed a bit too young to really ‘get’ meditation so this activity ends unsuccessfully. It is clear that Alex is much more concerned with getting us to love music at the end of our lessons than actually teaching us how to play. I quite like this about him as he lets out another awesome one-liner “I don’t care if you don’t learn anything, i still get paid”. He is too cool.
The lesson continues and we are given sheets of paper. David, the youngest of the troupe gets bored and starts banging his hand on his guitar. The lesson pretty well went down hill from here and ended up with us having some homework to do. Learn a song for which we have been given the sheet music for, it’s the easiest song in th world and i can tell that the lesson has been a complete waste of time for the 2 kids that can already play, it’s been amusing for me, and it has been downright boring for David who seems to have been ignored all lesson as he is way too young to concentrate on anything for longer than 5 minutes and has no real in learning guitar in the first place.
I look forward to my next lesson.
